Had it been a bear, it would have bitten you.

If ‘ifs’ and ‘ans’ were pots and pans, there’d be no work for tinkers.

If ‘ifs’ and ‘ans’ were pots and pans, tinkers would cuss and beggars would ride.

If a frog had wings, he wouldn’t bump his ass when he jumped.

If a frog had wings, it wouldn’t bump its tail on the ground.

If a pig had wings, it could fly.

If cows had wings, we’d all run for cover.

If I had some ham, I’d have ham and eggs, if I had some eggs.

If it was a snake, it would’ve bit ye.

If my Aunt had a beard, she’d be my Uncle.

If my Auntie had bollocks, she’d be my Uncle.

If my grandmother had wheels, she would be a trolley bus / tram / bicycle.

If pigs had wings, they’d be pigeons.

If we had some cheese, we could have macaroni cheese, if we had some macaroni.

If wishes were fishes, we’d never go hungry.

If wishes were horses, beggars would ride.

If you do what you have always done, you’ll get what you’ve always got.

If you’ve always got what you always get, you’ll always get what you’ve always got.